I Can't Get No...Metamusil

According to a recent news story, the Rolling Stones bassist Bill Wyman felt relief after leaving the band in '93. Bandmates Mick Jagger and Keith Richards did not have any respect for him, because in the band's early years, Bill did not share thier interest in drugs other than cannabis.

It was soon after the Rolling Stones launched their first World Tour (estimated sometime around the 5th century BC) that fire was discovered - and pot smoking became in vogue.

Our inside sources tell us that the band is launching yet another World Tour and have prepared a peculiar set of demands for each of the venues including:

1. wheelchair accessibility (Keith Richards has been having trouble with stairs for the last 50 years)
2. freshly squeezed prune juice
3. adult size depends (Mick Jagger's bladder is no longer trusted, as he can't remember using the washroom since Jimmy Carter was in the oval office)
4. bran flakes with extra fibre (this will insure even the guitar techs will stay "regular")
5. on stage "clapper" devices so nobody in the band will have to bend down to turn off electric instruments, peddles, sound equipment and microphones

If you haven't already caught Jenn Tilley talking about other bands strange requests - please check out this episode of Distortions.