There may be hope in the fossil fuel crisis...

So just when you thought civilization was headed in a terminal tailspin which would result in the ultimate worst case scenario of mutual assured destruction (MAD), Heinz has solved the problem of dwindling fuel reserves. A new product will be launched later this month which is a frozen sandwich which cooks beans inside the bread. Although it will only be available in New Zealand until next year, once this product hits the shelves in the UK, there will be no shortage of gas in Great Britain. British Heinz spokesman Nigel Dickie said: "We will be looking at how it performs and it may then be something for the UK market, given that we are the world's biggest bean-eating nation. " Now if we could only harness some of that keen insight into solving some of the world's other problems like AIDS or global warming, we might be making progress towards a greater society.